Gosh, I hope that saying is true! "Do what you love and the money will follow".
When I found out I was pregnant with Connor, I made a commitment to be a MOM. It was an easy decision..ha! Actually, I mean - I made a commitment to be a Stay-At-Home Mom ONLY. No more career, no more side tracks, no more work obligations taking away from my kid's time. I have felt so blessed over the past 7 years to owork only part time (when I got antsy from just being home). I have enjoyed being free to attend school events, volunteer to chaperone field trips, commit to PTA Board positions...this time and involvement in school activities is really a gift to me and to my children.
When Kameron was little, it was just the two of us. So Mama worked full time. While I worked hard to build a career, I was always in attendance at his games, scouting activities and any other activities (after work hours). I always felt bad that he didn't have a parent there for field trips, special lunches and fun daytime classroom events. He never complained but I always envied the Stay at Home Moms that were so PRESENT.
So with Connor I made a decision that I would make my family and our home my full time job. I have spent countless hours up til 2am trying to figure out how to stretch a county employees salary and how and where to cut expenses. I guess being a single mom for 13 yrs made this project almost second nature to me...I managed to have our expenses paid on time each month, budget for items we needed, not have credit card debt and to build up a small emergency fund. :) (patting myself on the back!!)
I looked at my role as a volunteer as an honor, as a blessing and as a gift. I branched out and began studying other 'causes' that were important to me and getting involved in researching health, nutrition and foods too. Idle is definitely not a word you can use to describe me. I have many interests and a thirst for knowledge and understanding - so I pursued it all. One of the hardest parts about coming to grips with our marriage ending has been also coming to grips with how this will change how much of my time is spent...Mama will have to go back to work. UGH!!! I am not afraid of working, just seems like a huge waste of time when my heart isn't in it.
I have been out of the job market and my industry for 8 years. A lot has changed...and it won't be easy to jump back in and earn the wonderful salary that I left behind to be a wife and mother. To be honest, I am resent the fact that I can't just be a Mom anymore. At this point in my life, I am looking more at the job than at the salary. Life is just too precious to waste away my day earning an income by performing a list of tasks that has no real meaning or value in the end. I am reflecting a lot lately on what I love to do, the things I lose all track of time doing, the causes that I am passionate about and the natural skills that I possess. I am determined to find a way to turn what I know that I am supposed to be doing, into a way to support my children financially. Haven't figured it all out yet...
But feel that I am closer today than I ever have been!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment